Thursday, February 12, 2009

Complications,

So, I'm sitting here at home on my 2 months anniversary with him alone. I'm sitting here, thinking and drinking my thai hot tea. Tomorrow, I leave for San Jose. I'm trying my best to blog here whenever I can.. It's hard to make a commitment, and keep to it. Seriously, I try my best, but nothing works. I could go on for pages, and pages complaining about how I feel about everything. Complaining that life issn't exciting anymore, how everything issn't fair. I haven't had a deep conversation with someone in a while, I think I need one pretty soon. I'm so confused on so many levels. I find that life is easier when nobody is pushing you onto what you don't want to do. Nothing lasts forever, it only lasts a lifetime. The lifetime can end, at any minute. You're just sitting here and waiting, rotting away. 3 Valentine's ago, I got a box of hershey's chocolates, a teddy bear (that I don't know where I put), and an artificial rose. 1 Valentine's ago, I got a box of chocolates, a balloon, and a real rose. I wonder what Charles is planning me this Valentine's day.. My parent's aren't going to be together this Valentine's day, because my step dad is taking me to San Jose, and my mom and sister are going to Las Vegas. I want togo to school tomorrow, but I don't think I can stand PE. Or, some of the other classes. So, I guess I'll wait until Tuesday for a LATE valentine's gift. 5 days without seeing Charles? Issn't that hard enough? ):

Today I'm sad, but I don't know why. I guess, because I didn't get to see him.. When I really wanted to, but there's really nothing I could do about it. I'll stop ranting now, bye.

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